Post by Froix on Dec 13, 2007 14:20:45 GMT
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One cold night on the way to the privy I tripped over a stupid log. Well, who left that flaming thing out in the middle of the path to release? I grumbled as I steadied myself on the path. Limping slightly, I moved towards the crazy flaming ninja that wore diapers. Saying to him, “You must be the only one that truly has a diaper that smells like a big filthy rotten flaming goat cheese.” I spat out my piece of tobacco in horror as the ninja ran towards the lantern of doom which was directly opposite the latrine that has a foul stench radiating, long and floating where the stools sang their stories of happy days, without nasty germs and silly birds which made noises like when Footy acted very clumsy while handling some very mysterious matters of the greatest importance to all citizens of the stinking caverns of Barnes & Noble.
Diaper Ninja advanced reading the label of the bottle of strange brew that he’d found in a book that also has directions for use of poisonous herbs containing Hallucinogenic properties that made you see crazy things like purple elephants and hot pink mini duckies who burp pansies and swim across muddy lakes of fire!!! After the ninja cut off a big chunk of cheddar cheese that melted in his fist before he made cheese dip and a hearty bowl of creamy yogurt for his little pet called Corki’s Little Helper who was always wearing little umbrellas out in the hazy purple sky of Mount Everest where he waited silently, counting the minutes until dinner arrived fresh from the hidden isles of the lush but crazy Amazons.
Three warrior women armed with makeup decided to bobsleigh in a bathtub filled with bubbly blue bubble bath that smelled of The Rock’s cooking. While they dried their armpits with cats stolen from the Amish family who lived on a rather strange pig called Gerald who only ate rice, cabbage and sweet potato soup. When the Amish rebellion rose up then the pig ran off to roll around in a big pile of onion peels. The Amish daddy, who’s name is Baron Von Turkleton, destroyer of flowers and protector of all things rotten, including, the hairy round smelly impish Ewok of terror, who likes to pull implements of torture and destruction while eating a muddy boot strap, decided to go to the far side of the Star Trek convention full of Imperial Star Troopers who were wearing rather skimpy and revealing bikini's festooned with flowers of many Aroma's, like curry, rosemary and thyme.
Disaster struck, as the Amish dad appears again, for the latrine monster spewed forth ghastly smelling fumes of feculent emissions from Gerald the pig. This ensured freedom for the elephants, who's ears flapped when someone from beyond reasonable credibility lifted a leg to check if they were still able to do the Hokey Pokey. With this confirmed, elephants honked with delight and wonder at the flamboyant pink dressed girl who liked to shake her rattle snake by the old gum tree located near the Gates of Hell The elephants ate spinach cookies which tasted like sweaty t-shirts from Pop-Eye with great big stains of fresh turnip pie drippings and dumpling smears which looked delishious something like Gordon but without the Flash.
As a giant turtle walked into the area and was chewing blue mushrooms and pink and purple spotted lettuce leaves I thought I had decided to take a break from ugly situation so I went back to the Chamber of Horrors so I could start all over with a new set of transparent Clothes, while prancing in some jello while painted yello and looking pale I drank ale. "Such frilly clothing which is very much this season's hot, new rage in the world of make-believe fashion for gnats and inanimate objects He now decided to make peace with the forks in order to to make them less hostile to the overwhelming spoons of doom and the knives of tranquility.
Therefore to have peace with the purple porcupines of red woods he traveled to to a new place of rest and relaxation, so he mounted his donkey and set off on his journey of his life. He then drank some Brew and could not cope with the new beings that inhabited the cold dark but white Black thing that wandered through wild bushes that tangled anyone who passed them.
And so he left a trail full of rotten and smelly purple peanut butter that attracted rats to the lair of the power of Nimro, the fierce, mad beast of the North-western hemisphere. He looked around the world for his treasure horde, but to calm his friend he pulled out a fascinating object which looked like a shiny raspberry which glowed like a small sun except with seven new moons that shined dully in night sky, which could not be shinier than my magical eagle talisman that flies away carrying pink fluffy gerbils to a warehous. Then he gibbered like heathen chipmonks on helium and nitrogen gas and the hyperactive weesles were about to wreak havoc that only they are capable of.
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In the morning